50 Ways to Leave Your Lover Pt 2

There must be 50 ways to leave your lover, oh there’s certainly more than that. No matter what your reasoning may be, it’s time to move on. Don’t be coy, don’t discuss much and be quick about it. Below are 50 ways to leave your lover.

26. Tell him you’ve come to the realization that you just aren’t ready for a real relationship.

27. Change your facebook status from “in a relationship” to “single.”

28. Leave her a voicemail while she’s at work.

29. Call his mom and tell her that you no longer want to be with her son, then hangout.

30. Tell her you’ve got an incurable disease.

31. Act it out during an impromptu game of charades.

32. Pay to have it written on a billboard that he often passes on his way to work with his picture next to the sentence “I’m sorry, but you’ve got get your stuff out of my apartment.”

33. Send her a huge, beautiful bouquet of flowers with a card attached saying it’s over.

34. Steal his credit card and buy a bunch of clothing and then disappear.

35. Call him on his work phone to do the deed.

36. Give her a big hug and a kiss then tell her you no longer love her.

37. Have her meet you at an expensive restaurant, don’t show up and give the waiter a big tip to tell her for you.

38. Write her a song about it then serenade her on her at her birthday party.

39. Tell her you’re joining the seminary to become a priest.

40. Inform him that you’ve been thinking about it for a while and that you’re going to have a sex change.

41. Take a day off from work and move all of your stuff out while she’s at work.

42. Tell her you’ve been arrested for an unnamed crime and you’ll be heading to prison for 5 to 10 years.

43. Write it on a note and slip it into a burger and serve it to her, bonus points if she’s a vegetarian.

44. Just move away and avoid the whole breakup process all together.

45. Have your dad tell him it’s over for you.

46. Collect all of her things, place them in a box in front of your home with a sign that says “free.”

47. Tell her that you’ve decided dream career in the porn industry.

48. Order a special pizza with a breakup message spelt out in pepperoni.

49. Smash in all of her BMW accessories, take your key and scrape a breakup poem into the hood of her car.

50. Tell him you’re converting to Judaism and you can’t date out of your denomination.

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